Still Life

Sleeping Woods | Yea Yea Pueblo

Still life: what an elusive concept.

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With Isaac out of town the last two weeks, and Woods refusing to sleep through the night without mums face within arms reach, sleep has been fleeting, and alone time has been an abstract notion.

Tensions rose to a breaking point: the unending laundry, the sleep deprivation, and the thankless, lonely week left me on the brink of eruption. But the mood in my home finally pivoted from heavy and melancholy to light and refreshed. The kids and I napped at the same time this afternoon. I can’t ever remember catching sleep when feeling so run down, and I speculate I will never again be graced with a nap at such a opportune moment.

Downstairs, the vegetarian chili on the stove burned without my attentive stirring, and a package on the front porch sat uncollected, but when I awoke from my cat nap, my cheeks were rosy and youthful, and my spirit was restored. I could have cried from the relief, and maybe I did — but the takeaway is that I was extended grace when I needed it most, allowing me to do the same to my children.

Winter  | Yea Yea Pueblo Sally the Beagle | Yea Yea Pueblo Still Life | Yea Yea Pueblo I suppose one day I’ll realize these days will come and go, whether or not Isaac is called to service away from home. My sophomoric attitude towards motherhood needs refining through experience. If this week has taught me anything, it’s that I’m well on my way to gaining wisdom, but I think I’d rather have a full night’s sleep.

 

7 Comment

  1. Kay Beauchamp says: Reply

    I’m proud of you Crystle. With Isaac away and your small children under foot, sleep is ALWAYS more important than ANY household chore. Take care of yourself so you can care for your kiddos and then your home. You are on your way to becoming a strong, capable, and wise military wife. Kay

    1. Courtney says: Reply

      Oh, no. Regularly not sleeping is just so, so hard, and not having your husband home in the evenings to help out or even just give you a hug and some encouragement makes it feel impossible. I wish I could come over and watch your two babies while you took a long, peaceful nap. I can’t even count how many times I cried from sheer exhaustion when Paul was deployed last winter…and I only had one baby. Hang in there.

      1. Yes, Courtney! You know exactly what I’m talking about. Isaac will be home in about two weeks, so it’s just a stamina game now, but I definitely miss those hugs, thank-yous, and words of encouragement on the reg.

        There is buzz on post about a deployment coming soon, so I’ll definitely have to come to you for some words of wisdom if/when the time comes!

    2. Thanks for the words of encouragement, Kay!

      Not even a 24 after I posted this, I had to rush Margot to the ER after she took a spill down the bottom few stairs and busted her lip open. Since I didn’t see it happen, I wanted a physician to check her out — she’s fine, and didn’t need any stitches.

      I’ve been told “it’s not a true deployment if you don’t make a trip to the ER at some point.” I thought we’d be exempt since Isaac is only away at NTC for a month!

  2. CeCe says: Reply

    Sleep…..it’s a beautiful thing! In the meantime, hang in there- ALL us mothers can relate!

    1. So much for hibernating this winter.

      1. And so much for breakfast this morning — the dog snatched my homemade granola bar off the coffee table when I wasn’t looking.

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